I am awesome at sleeping

So last night I dreamt about going somewhere with Kari, who (in my dream) routed our trip on my phone using Google Navigation.

So in my sleep, I got my phone out, somehow unlocked it with my magical Android unlock pattern, and was looking at maps. The only thing I really remember is that the brightness of my phone woke Kari up, she wondered wtf was going on, and I couldn't explain it to her. I could not for the life of me figure out the words for google maps, gps, navigation, directions, etc... The only thing I could come up with was "the nightstand alarm map thing."

I got pissed about my lack of sleep communication skills... but apparently there was more to the story. Here's an email from Kari this morning:

so last nite i wake up to you getting all excited, rubbing all over me, trying to make out and laughing hysterically...

me: "wtf derek? what are you doing?"
you: "oh boy!" rubbing your hands together, and clapping

then i thought you went back to sleep, but a couple minutes later you were laughing, looking at your phone...

me: "derek, what are you doing? go to sleep babe. you are dreaming."
you: "well! where is the map?"
me: i am getting hysterical now... "what map? what are you looking for derek?"
you: "well you said you had the map to the nite stand!"
me: "what?! you are dreaming... there is no map for the nite stand!"
you: "you're a liar! the map for the alarm on the nite stand! where is it? you said you had it!"
me: "derek! there is no map, you are dreaming! you aren't even making sense! go back to bed!"
you: "you are lying!"
me: "okay." hysterically laughing! haha!

then you just got pissed, and went back to sleep. and when i tried to rub your back, you were real mad at me.. hahaha!

...At least I didn't pee in her closet.

written by 28 year old Derek Brooks

... pee in the closet... again!

kari posted

I used to sleepwalk when I was a kid, but this is some next-level stuff.

mhposted

hahaha.. Omg. Dude you and kari are halarious

@effeblackposted

and since everyone keeps asking - no, i was not drunk. i had a single beer earlier that evening.
maannn, thats SO great!

reddposted

ha! this is hilarious!

Tarposted