Microblog

If you're in Des Moines, there's a super rad art show and happy hour at my office today. Come check it out. t.co/iWsDAvWbfY

Anyone wanna get into a fantasy bass fishing league?

Kari and I booked a trip to Nicaragua today.

Call me Dongle Derek

I have a "sorta like / hate" relationship with our home.

I highly recommend a few of these San Francisco tips: clickhole.com/a...rfect-day--5783

IT'S A LADDER MATCH

Every time I sit in a leather chair without a shirt on, I spend the entire time internally debating whether it feels awesome or awful.

this new kendrick - humble track is red hot fire
youtu.be/tvTRZJ-4EyI

This dude t.co/t3Fb2UzX6J

It ain't easy bein a douche

Switching back to iOS for a bit... Dismissing notifications from the lock screen is a real pain in the dick.

if you get a wedding invitation that has both your and your spouse's names spelled incorrectly on it... do you go to that wedding?

Thank you for bringing more 93 octane to Iowa @kumandgo! More love if you ditch the ethanol. t.co/UQJRPaDDq8

This is what I'm wearing tomorrow t.co/wUAIADKm9x

Imagine being a butthole

Just got served glasses of port that tasted like goddamn malort at The Latin King. Blech.

These pants were not made for near-miss connecting flight speed walks... Whew. See ya soon, Des Moines.

Are you allowed to take your shirt off on airplanes?

This week I was trained on Node and microservices within the PayPal infrastructure by a wild boar hunter.