Microblog

I've never gone to a grocery store and thought, you know what this place could use? Clothes... Bland, grocery store clothes. Come on, @HyVee

The Drake fangirls are OUT in Des Moines tonight.

My friend @brianholcomb asks a very important question... Will the headphone jack on the Google Pixel work with my lightning headphones?

This weekend I played beer pong, but with water instead of beer. This is gonna sound weird, but it was so much better.

"Dude, wanna go to an after hours party?" "No, thank you" ... is how I should've answered.

This dude named Gay Derek just bought me a cocktail and told me that I'm wearing a pansy shirt

Kari and I hit pretty big milestone today when she asked, "wanna go to Best Buy and look at TVs?" ... We didn't do it! ... but we're talkin

Dude asks me what color my car is as I pull into the gas station. I say, "blue" ... and then got to watch immense rage sweep over his face.

Donald Trump, please save us. Amen.

2 dope 2 cope

Yeezy boosts look pretty stupid, tbh

Google Apps is now called G Suite. That's dope, G. Sweet!

I microwave a scrambled egg every morning and then put expensive salts and peppers on it

I just ordered some new shades for the house, because apparently adults don't live with sheets covering their windows.

The PayPal iOS app is really nice. JFYI

and why in the FUCK does Apple call it Settings on iOS and Preferences on macOS?

Drive to office. Realize parking pass is in your other car. Go back and work from home. #brooxlyfe

Listening to the new Weeknd - Starboy track and trying to pretend like I didn't just witness that "presidential" debate.

Holy... That was debate brutal.

Anyone else feel like the overall UX in iOS 10 is worse? I'm constantly mistapping and mis-swiping.