Microblog

Who should I use for a small run of ~50 screen printed tees?

It's fun to see which apps don't care about people with poor vision or severely dilated pupils.

Settings > Accessibility > Large text

Fine tuning my eyeballs. flickr.com/phot...ox/13958200684/

Is it illegal to set up trip lines to stop little suburban shits from running through your landscaping? Asking for a friend...

That time David Arquette photobombed my photo of @harper and @scottvdp ... derek.broox.com...ott-vandenplas/

In talking about celebrity musicians, I just told everyone that Danny Glover was a rapper called Childish Gambino... I am terrible at celebs

now I want to be your dog.

ok, I need an old sock, scissors, masking tape, gorilla glue, a toothpick , a damp paper towel, helping hands, and flickr.com/phot...ox/13949403733/

Snapchat has trained me to long press all sorts of things that don't need long presses.

"Don’t have a My Account? Register for one today!" ... Nailed it, @HomeDepot.

Great weather, yard work, grilling, cigars. It's good to be home.

Whoa. It's summer in Iowa.

That moment your jet slams on it's brakes mid takeoff and loops around to try again...

Kinda hoping this train ramps into O'Hare and drops me off on the tarmac to board my plane.

Welp. Looks like it's time to schedule an eye exam... or get some tape. flickr.com/phot...ox/13935565545/

Good morning, Chicago. You smell like a butthole.

Tiredest dude east of the Mississippi. Excited to go home tomorrow and rest for a few days.

TOTS ON TOTS ON TOTS

Just accidentally hailed us a limo for dinner, lol. Welp!