This is a collection of 19,064 things that my ADHD mind has puked out over the last 15.59 years.

Check out my latest entries below, some of my top remarks or some things that I love or wish for.


“What the fuck is wrong you guys?” - the person next to me and Josh in the hot tub

Josh and I are doing water taste tests between the hotel taps and nalgenes of water that we brought from our home towns.

Kari's ass: smacked. Cold pizza: snacked. Jeep: packed. Dewski: cracked. Heading north.

If you’re watching Kim Reynolds’s response to the state of the union, please accept our apology and just appreciate Iowa’s pretty capital building in the background.

My favorite sanction so far is the international Tae Kwon Do association taking away Putin's black belt.

My biggest hang up with this hard Mountain Dew is: I primarily enjoy my dewskis in the morning or while driving.

I can’t wait until I can look at some clock/calendar combo and see that it’s 2/22/22 22:22:22 and then say, “Oh yeah, baby.”

Just went to the gym for the first time in nearly 2 years and it felt awesome. I had also forgotten how much old men like to let their butts and nuts hang in the locker room.

If you ever see some graffiti or a bathroom wall that says, “eat shit and die” … just add commas.